What about "Socialization?"

Time, after time we are asked about our children's "socialization" when they are educated at home. This cartoon was drawn by a home schooling father. If only those who ask us could see the results that we experience first-hand.

Never Say Never

A few years ago when I was younger, more naive, and not married; I was dating a young man who I was quite serious with. We had discussed children numerous times and he told me that he would prefer I have them naturally. I proceeded to laugh and decide he was crazy. I later, after marrying my husband, had no choice but to deliver my stillborn son , naturally and am truly grateful I did. I proceeded to have my next two children without pain meds as well (though I did have piction with one labor to speed things up). I share this because I thought the same exact thingwhen I was introduced to the idea of homeschooling. I had met a gal - who was newly married and already reading the 5 Pillars classics & preparing herself to homeschool her children and I thought - quite frankly - she's nuts. However, she and another mutuaal friend proceeded to introduce me to A Thomas Jefferson Education and I couldn't put the book down. I finally understood for the first time ever why I was so unhappy with my schooling experience and could recall very little of what I had learned. It made me determined to make sure that my children never suffered such a fate if i could have any say in it.

I call myself a homeschooling mom now because I do all I can to provide daily learning experiences planned and othrwise for my son & daughter. I strive to make note of what works with what child, and what interests each of them. I strive to instill in them the qualities , values, & principles my parents instilled in me.

I never thought in a million year I would be one of those "homeschooling moms", but I am more than proud to wear the badge now .

The Baby IS the Lesson

I wanted to share one of the articles that helped me have the courage to home school - even with having a baby. This is by Diane Hopkins

One morning on my daily walk, I was fretting and stewing over what I could possibly do with my one-year-old during school time. I was feeling some despair with a new baby on its way. I couldn't see any end to the disruption of babies in my home school for many years to come. I was praying and scheming at the same time: I could wait until the baby's nap to teach school, I could rotate the children with baby-sitting chore away from our schoolroom, I could get a playpen, etc.: all solutions that didn't feel right--babies needs their moms!As I walked and pondered, suddenly the Lord introduced one sentence to my mind and revolutionized my mindset entirely! "The baby IS the lesson!" I thought I was trying to teach Math, but in reality I had been teaching, day by day, how an adult values the precious gift of children. My children, by watching how I deal with the frustration of a crying baby or keep a toddler happy and busy with some of his "own" pieces while we play a math game, are soaking up "the lesson". Unfortunately, I had occasionally been teaching that the baby interrupts our learning.How to be a Christlike person is the most valuable lesson a child could ever learn! The lesson is learned moment by moment; watching a parent being patient, handling frustration with kindness, pressing on for the goal in spite of numerous interruptions, valuing each child's needs regardless of inconvenience. That valuable insight--how Mother handles the baby is the real lesson--has dramatically changed how I view my home school.

I am teaching foremost my values: godly character, kindness, respect for others, individuality, sacrifice and a host of other Christlike attributes. Teaching them reading, writing, math, etc. is very important to me but my perspective has been altered. "Mimic me, follow me and I will show you the way a Christlike person acts and what he values". That is the message every parent relays to their children whether they are aware of it or not. Children try to copy everything anyway (our mannerisms, our daily activities, etc.). We must be certain that we are providing a correct pattern for them to copy, not only in our daily activities but in our attitude, our tone of voice, and our facial expression. We need to conduct our lives so that we can say "follow me". If our children are to "buy" our values, what a tremendous responsibility we have to make sure we are living our best so the lesson is clear and well learned! What more could you ask for from your homeschool than to produce Christlike people?!Teaching your children basically means getting your own personal life in order and striving daily to be the leader for them to follow. Of course, we fall short and they must look to Christ for the perfect being but they need to see daily how one acts, speaks, lives, solves problems. We are acting as a proxy, in a sense, for Christ. Since they can't have his daily role model, then he has given his children parents to be an example, to point the way. Along with lesson preparations, we need to prepare ourselves by asking: is the pattern I live the way Christ would act? Can I say today that I have marked the path for my children to follow? Children learn from seeing their parent's role model. Watching an adult make a simple mistake (such as being too punitive with a child) and go through the process of repenting is 100 times more effective than your devotional lesson on repentance. This means children must be intimately involved with you in your daily life. A few hours a day after school won't do it.Children should be involved in the adult's life rather than daily life rotating around the children.

Research has shown that children who have grown up to be productive well-adjusted adults are those who have been drawn into the parent's world; their daily activities, work, and interests; rather than having parents who centered their world on the child. When I began home schooling, I never could find the time to do the things I felt were important for my life; such as writing in my journal, corresponding with relatives, studying my scriptures, and more. Somehow, in my busy-ness of trying to teach the kids how to write in their journals, I was neglecting my own journal writing. Thankfully, we now have journal writing time in school daily, and we write letters to relatives together as a family on Sunday. Homeschool life should help parents do the daily necessities, rather than usurp the time needed for them. Home maintenance, chores, food preparation, gardening, food preservation, budgeting, clothing care (mending and sewing), planning family social relationships, caring for small children, record keeping, quilting, wallpapering, etc. are all wonderful life skills that can be done together that enhance a child's education!The parent's joyful task is to lead and guide the child into the real world--not set up a contrived pseudo-world to teach skills that the children would easily learn if they spent their time around adults who were striving to live good lives. What constitutes an adult trying to live a "good life"? Being a productive adult would constitute a full-time curriculum! Plant a garden, read good literature, serve the needy, be politically aware, keep a journal, vote for honest men, develop your talents, etc. The exciting part about leading a child into the real world is that they are self-motivated. The moment I sit down to play the piano, all my children want to play and want me to teach them to play something. No sooner than I begin typing on the computer, I have the whole family "needing" to type. My efforts at writing have, humorous to me, stimulated the production of "books" from my youngest children.

Modeling is so much more effective than lecturing. Studies show that the biggest determining factor for a child's success in reading in school is if they have seen a parent reading in the home on a regular basis. This is especially true for boys if the parent who reads is their father, rather than their mother. Somehow, the example says far more about the value of reading than endless hours in school reading groups.In every area, it takes instruction to teach skills to little people. Children need to master the basic academic skills (reading, writing, arithmetic), social manners, music competence, and a host of other abilities and that does take focused concentration and time from mother/teacher to accomplish. It isn't realized just by living in a family. But shared family life practices and contributes to those skills. Having taught my little girl the numbers and the plus, minus and equal signs and how they worked, she jumped right into figuring out how many plates she needed to set the table using her new skills: ("We have 9 and the boys are gone to college so that is minus 3, so we need six").

When we think of homeschool, sometimes we get tunnel vision, and think "academics", "keeping up to speed" and other worrisome concerns that don't really tell the whole story. Homeschool is the growing and nurturing of fine, upright people. So, how we treat and value the baby really is the lesson.Class never dismissed.—Diane Hopkins

Too true Cartoon!

I love this cartoon! It makes me laugh but it also makes me sad... all those wasted years of my own youth.... I am posting this in an effort to remind all of us not to just "do school" at home... let's find a better way to raise our children's generation, (no not just our own children)... let's challenge ourselves and our children, let's change our lost and confused society! Let's be the few, the proud, the homeschoolers (sounds corny, but I mean it!) Let's not be ashamed of the choice we made to train our children up in the way they should go--24/7!

Linder Farms

Today over twelve home schooling families met at Linder Farms for a Pumpkin Patch field trip.
We had a great time with the petting animals (even a camel and zebra,) hay bale and corn maze, and a hay ride pulled by an old tractor.
Each child was able to take a pumpkin home, as long as they were able to carry it.
What a wonderful way to enjoy autumn's adventures.

Classical Music Curriculum

Adult Sources:
A. Copeland, What to Listen for in Music
B. Kavanaugh, Spiritual Lives of the Great Composers
C. Fuller, How to Grow a Young Music Lover

October Vivaldi
Suggested Music: The Four Seasons (a must), Violin Concerto in A Minor, Op. 3, 6
Audio: Classical Kids: Vivaldi's Ring of Mystery, Douglas Cowling,
Other possible sources: Introducing Vivaldi, Roland Vernon Musical concept: volume

November Peter Tchaikovsky
Suggested Music: 1812 Overture, Nutcracker Suite
Audio: Classical Kids, Tchaikovsky Discovers America, Susan Hammond
Famous Children Series, Ann Rachlin
Fieldtrip: Nutcracker Suite
For older kids and read aloud: Two by Opal Wheeler
Other: Getting to Know the World's Greatest Composers Series, Mike Venezia
Musical concept: tempo

December Handel
Suggested Music: Messiah, Joy to the World (about Second Coming), Soulful Celebration (try it!), Firework Music, Water Music
Adult: Spiritual Lives, The Man who Wrote Messiah, D. Berreby, Reader's Digest Apr. '92
Audio: Classical Kids Series, Hallelujah Handel, Douglas Cowling
Book: Famous Children
Video: Handel's Last Chance, Devine, D. For older kids or read aloud: Handel at the Court of Kings, Opal Wheeler
Fieldtrip: Handel's Messiah
Other: Handel: Who Knew What he Liked
Getting to Know the World's Greatest Composers Series, Mike Venezia
Musical concept: melody

January Bach
Suggested Music: Joy to Man's Desiring, Brandenburg Concerto #2, Minuet in G
Adult: Spiritual Lives
Audio: Mr. Bach Comes to Call, S. Hammond (Classical Kids Series)
Video: Bach's Fight for Freedom
Book: Famous Children Series, Ann Rachlin; Bach's Goldberg Variations, Anna Harwell Celenza
Older Kids or read aloud: Sebastian Bach: Boy from Thuringa, Opal Wheeler
Other sources: Sebastian, J. Winter
Glory and Honor: The Musical and Artistic Legacy of Johann Sebastian Bach, Gregory Wilbur
Getting to Know the World's Greatest Composers Series, Mike Venezia
Musical concept: rhythm

February Franz Joseph Haydn
Suggested Music: Thanks to our Father, Primary Children's Songbook p. 20, The Seasons, The Creation, Symphonies 45 and 94, Op. 76, #3; 76, # 4
Book: Famous Children Series, Haydn, A. Rachlin; The Farewell Symphony, Celenza; The Surprise Symphony, Celenza
For older kids or read aloud: Haydn: The Merry Little Peasant, Opal Wheeler
Musical concept: pitch

March Wolfgang Amadaeus Mozart
Suggested Music: Ah, Vous Dirais-je (Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star), The Magic Flute, The Marriage of Figaro Overture
Adult: Spiritual Lives
Audio: Classical Kids Series: Mozart's Magic Fantasy: a Journey Through the Magic Flute, Mozart's Magnifican Voyage, D. Cowling
Book: The Magic Flute: Anne Gatti (book and CD),
Famous Children Series
Video: The Magic Flute (DVD in system claims to be for children)
For older kids or read aloud: Mozart the Wonder Boy, Opal Wheeler
Mozart, Scenes from the Childhood of the Great Composers, E. Brighton
Mozart Tonight, J. Downing
Getting to Know the World's Greatest Composers Series, Mike Venezia
Musical concept: harmony

April Ludwig von Beethoven
Suggested Music: Symphonies 5 and 9, The Heroic Symphony, Piano music 8 and 14, Hallelujah Chorus from Christ on the Mount of Olives
Adult: Spiritual Lives
Video: Beethoven Lives Upstairs (also in book and audio)
Book: Value Tales: The Value of Giving, The Heroic Symphony, A. H. Celenza, Famous Children Series
For older kids or read aloud: Beethoven and the Chiming Tower Bells, Opal Wheeler
Other sources: Getting to Know the World's Greatest Composers Series, Mike Venenzia
Musical concept: some singing instruction

May Frederic Chopin
Suggested Music: Revolutionary Etude Op. #10, #20, Fantasy Impromptu Op. #66, Etude in A Minor, Op. #25, and #11
Adult: Spiritual Lives
Book: Famous Children, Chopin, A. Rachin
For older kids or read aloud: Frederic Chopin: Early Years, Frederic Chopin: Later Years, Frederic Chopin: Son of Poland all by Opal Wheeler

June
Other Stuff Too Good to Miss! Maybe take a week on each?
Camile Saint Saens: Carnival of the Animals (look for the video, too), Danse Macabre
Pacabel's Cannon
Gerswin: Rhapsody in Blue, Book: Gershwin's Rhapsody in blue, Anna Harwell Celenza
For older kids: George Gerswin, American Composer, C. Reef
Meet the Orchestra, by Ann Hayes in conjunction with Peter and the Wolf
Musical concept: tone color

Other Composers for some other time
Felix Mendelssohn Bartholdy, Hark, the Herald Angels sing
A Midsummer Night's Dream
Spiritual Lives
Hidden Music: The Life of Fanny Mendelssohn, G. Kamen
Mendelssohn, Melodic Masterpieces
Famous Composers for Young People, G. Burch

Johannes Brahms, Hungarian Dance #5
Wiegenlied, Brahms Lullaby
Symphony #1, Op.68
Savior Hear Us When we Pray
Spiritual Lives
Famous Children Series

Paper Music: Bobby McFerrin conducts and sings classics
Discoveries in Music or Melody Lane, Calvert School
Classical Kids, Song of the Unicorn and A Classical Kids Christmas both by Susan Hammond
The Accidental Voyage (a Mr. Pipes), Douglas Bond
Mr. Pipes and Psalms and Hymns of the Reformation, Douglas Bond
Mr. Pipes comes to America, Douglas Bond
books by Majorie Persons?
Can You Name that Classical Tune?
Pictures at at Exhibition
World's Very Best Opera for Kids
The A to Z of Classical Music
Franz Schubert: Life and Words
Famous Children Series: Schumann
Bravo! Brava! A Night at the Opera, Anne Siberell
Robert Schumann and Mascot Ziff, Opal Wheeler
The Gift of Music, Smith
Classical Kids: Bizet's Dream, Liszt's Rhapsody, Rossini's Ghost, D. Devine
Silent Night: The song and its Story

Can I Really Do Home Schooling?

I have to admit that I in many ways am still trying to get off the conveyor belt. A part of me still wonders if Isaac, my 5-year-old son, should be getting on the bus that takes the kindergartners to school that passes our house everyday. Most of his peers whom we have known from infancy are on this bus.

When I hear the other parents talk about how wonderful their child's teacher is, or "My son is starting to read," I think to myself...Can I really do this? Isaac can't even identify every letter of the alphabet yet, let a lone phonetically sound out new words. Am I really cut out for this? Isaac can not begin to compete with what his peers can do academically.

I then remind myself that academics are not a competition. Although Isaac would much rather swing and jump on the trampoline (what 5-year-old boy wouldn't) than formally sit down and learn his letters, I believe deep inside that I can make this work. Each day, Isaac's primary curriculum is to learn: appropriate relationships, how to work, and our faith. Every once in a while he is interested in a letter that he naturally finds in his world around him.

Today I had an "OK, may-be home schooling will work" moment. As I was watching a 3-year-old little boy, Isaac asked him to come sit down so he could "read" a library book to him. Isaac preceded to tell the story in his own words to his friend, page by page. It was awesome. I was amazed at Isaac's ability to recall the story that he had only heard once, and how excited he was to share it with his friend.

I hope to someday have Isaac try to teach his younger sisters to read. I guess right now I am going to trust my instincts that he will have a desire to learn to read on his own as long as my husband and I continue to exemplify reading and learning.

Need I Say More?

I belong to a online group of women who share my religious beliefs and one of them just shared a link with us about the effects same-sex marriage will have on our families - even our most precious little ones. Thankfully - I do not have to worry about this yet as the great state I currently reside in hasn't felt the need to press for this issue - but not all of us are this blessed. The link shares a story of a family in Massachusetts whose kindergarten son brought home a "diversity" backpack which included a book in which same-sex marriage was introduced. The parents were quite upset & approached the school about the issue stating that they should at least get a letter home about this and have the opportunity for their children to opt out of such a learning experience. Can you see where this is going? I really encourage you - no matter where you live - to check out this quick video. It's just yet another reason why I choose to home school.

School?

At our house we don't do "school". We have routines like get dressed, make your bed, brush your teeth... Then we have fiddle practice. Then Caden goes down for his nap and we gather for what we call school. It consists of a devotional of sorts where we have morning family prayer and then we study out of Gospel Principles together. Then we have "kids school" where I teach them whatever I feel like for anywhere from 5 minutes to an hour. Then they build things or draw or read while I study. Then we usually we have really great discussions around the lunch table about what we've each learned.
I have found that everyone remembers what they study themselves a lot better than they remember what they are "taught" plus, it really adds to the learning of the whole family when everyone learns what they are excited about and then teaches the rest of us.
For example, on Tuesday, we were studying the story of Daniel in the Lions Den as part of our study of Gospel Principles and Colin remembered that he had heard in The Story of the World that King Nebuchadnezzar had gone mad and ate grass. Somehow in my almost 30 years of life I'd never heard that story so we looked it up in Daniel. Sure enough he was right on, as usual. So we talked about that for a minute.
Later that night we told Randy what we'd learned just before he picked up The Long Winter to read to us. Three pages into chapter 31 he read, "'Could we eat grass?' Carrie asked. 'No, Nebuchadnezzar,' Pa laughed." Then, of course, we all laughed. It was great. I have read that book at least three times and never got that reference before Colin taught me the story. I love it when our books talk to each other and when my kids teach me things!


Sometimes I do freak out a bit and get nervous that we will miss something or some crazy fear like that. At those times, I take it to the Lord in prayer and he always comes through for me.
Two Examples:
1 - Geography.
I have issues with geography because the only thing I remember about geography is sitting in that basement room that had a lot of rolled up maps on the wall in the Jefferson. We colored a lot, don't remember what, and I remember wishing I could be across the hall in the library or the cafeteria instead. How was I going to "teach" my kids geography?!!
I read somewhere that the best way to learn geography was to draw maps. My artistic skills were killed in kindergarten when the class laughed at the "flower" hands that I drew. Those weren't petals - they were fingers! How was I going to "teach" my kids to draw maps.
I prayed about it and later that day at "school" I pulled out the Draw Write Now books and drew myself a chicken. I CAN draw and it's fun! I finished up the chicken with a barn and some hills. Caden helped me with the "finishing touches."



I left the books out on the table and went to make lunch. They were still out that night so Colin took one to bed with him after prayers, scriptures and stories. He came down to the kitchen around 10:00 holding a map of Australia he'd drawn. God does answer prayers! I didn't even know that maps were in that book. Colin has since drawn many, many maps and has big plans for building an interactive web page using his pictures.



2-Long Division
I do fine at good old fashioned arithmetic. I love it. Robyn spends hours doing her math workbooks and we have great times together. Colin doesn't particularly care for workbooks - as a general rule, they bore him silly. He spends hours working out problems that matter to him. He adds the letters in the alphabet using either the corresponding number on the telephone pad or the number the letter is in the alphabet (1-26). He even can add roman numerals and binary numbers. I cannot "teach" him math. I searched for math books that we could find common ground with and I think I found one. It's Life of Fred. Problem is, you have to know long division before you start.
I prayed about math and, the next day, Colin asked me how many 22s were in 72. He had made himself a game and didn't want to count the 72 spaces. He knew that there were 22 spaces on the board so if he knew how many 22s were in 72 he wouldn't have to count so much. He now knows a bit about long division.



Life is so fun!

Why do I Homeschool?

Hmm…
Time spent sitting at the table “doing school”(with classical music playing in the back ground): 2 ½ hours.
Time spent at the park playing catch with Dad during his lunch break: ½ hour.
Time spent lying on the grass with my children while eating cookies and reading C.S. Lewis together: 2+ hours.
Time spent doing whatever I wanted while my children created and played with “robot/alien/astronaut” costumes out of tinfoil, boxes, and various odd items: at least 3 hours.
…and that is only part of an average day!

It is widely documented that on average homeschooled students of all ages test higher than public and private school students –regardless of their parent’s education. In light of all the available research (see stats here) it seems that those who send their children to regular brick & mortar schools must have some reason for doing so other than the quality of their children's education. Perhaps both parents must work outside the home, one may have poor health, some may feel unqualified (if so, please re-read the first sentence in this paragraph more closely). Certainly there are some legitimate reasons; many of my friends admit they simply don’t like being around their children for too long, they need more time for themselves. (I commend their ability to look their decision squarely in the face and see it clearly for what it is.)

Another big issue with homeschooling is represented by the question I am most frequently asked, “What about SOCIALIZATION?!”

I have occasionally answered (with a twinkle in my eye) that "We’ve found the perfect solution to all of that… I just beat them up, steal their lunch money, and lock them in the bathroom once a week. Sometimes their dad and I won’t speak to them for a whole day because they were friendly with someone we don’t like, or ‘cause they didn’t dress in-vogue. Don’t worry, we know how important it is for our children to get a real school experience!” :)

In all honesty, no, homeschooled children are not socialized the same way public school students are, instead they are socialized the way the world truly is. Unless the family tries to be hermits they will inevitably socialize. In merely going about your daily life you interact regularly with all ages and in all kinds of situations. When you homeschool you simply take your children along through life with you, daily modeling appropriate socialization with immediate & extended family, neighbors, ecclesiastical leaders, librarians, people in the grocery store etc. All the homeschooled children I know will say “hello” to their siblings in public!! :) No, this is not the same kind of socialization! There are no clicks, negative pressure, or exclusion based on fashion or experience… instead there is love, acceptance, and guidance by those who truly care for their well-being. Homeschooled children still learn to work in a group, accept direction from adults other than their parents, and how to stick to a deadline; but more than all of this, they are allowed to explore, discover, dream, and be themselves. They are generally given a great deal of educational freedom (how shocking!) but studies repeatedly show us that they are more intelligent, creative, and enthusiastic about learning (and, I believe, happier) than their brick & mortar counterparts.

...And people ask me why I homeschool!

A Great and Spacious Building Without a Foundation

Is it any wonder that we have been warned to have no debt, a year supply of food storage, and three months of income in savings. I am so grateful for council we have received, so that we may not have to have anything to fear.

It's interesting what experts are now saying about our country's current situation --Read what Suze Orman says. May we all learn to live "Honest" financial lives...